No goats. No glory. Author Jon Ronson gave us a call to talk about his book and now major motion picture starring George Clooney, The Men Who Stare at Goats. [AUDIO] ‘The Men Who Stare at Goats’ is now playing.

Former owner of the Edmonton Oilers Peter “The man who sold Gretzky,” Pocklington, gave us a call to talk about I’d Trade Him Again: On Gretzky, Politics and the Pursuit of the Perfect Deal. [AUDIO]

The morning after: EITM political correspondent Patricia Murphy analyzed McDonnell’s win in Virginia, Christie’s win in New Jersey, Bloomberg’s third term in New York, and what’s in store for 2010. [AUDIO] For more from Patricia, check out ‘The Capitolist’ at politicsdaily.com

What would compel a man to place himself in constant danger in order to become a member of a wolf pack? To eat with them, putting his head into a carcass alongside the wolves’ gnashing teeth? To play, hunt, and spar with them, suffering bruises and bites? To learn their language so his howl is indistinguishable from theirs? To give up a normal life of relationships and family so that he can devote himself completely to the protection of these wild animals? Shaun Ellis, star of Animal Planet’s Living with the Wolfman and National Geographic Channel’s A Man Among Wolves, gave us a call to talk about his new book, The Man Who Lives with Wolves. [AUDIO]

The moment I walked out of that tunnel that first time I was in the NFL and saw 70,000 people, I said, "This is me, this is mine, this is what I was meant to do." Some people get scared that first time. Me? Scared my ass. I was loving it. Cincinnati Bengals wide receiver Chad Ochocinco gave us a call to talk about his new book, Ocho Cinco: What Football and Life Have Thrown My Way. [AUDIO]

“Are you the only person to play Carnegie Hall and sing about keystering drugs?” Our old friend Stephen Lynch checked in to talk about Friday’s Baltimore show and his latest CD, 3 Balloons, which features Elliot’s favorite song, “Fishin’ Hole” AKA “My assh*le’s an assh*le.” [AUDIO]

October 2009

Like you’ve never seen him before. Michael Jackon’s manager Ken DiLeo called to talk about This Is It, the tribute to Michael Jackson’s life and career, now playing in theaters and IMAX. [AUDIO]

“What I’m saying is that women are smarter [than men].” Actress Rashida Jones gave us a call to talk about Parks and Recreation. [AUDIO]

What do science fiction space odysseys, popcorn balls, mythical yeast, rebellious teenagers, plagiarism and Dr. Ronald Chevalier’s esteemed “anous workshop” have in common? ‘Napoleon Dynamite’ filmmaker Jared Hess came in to talk about Gentlemen Broncos, his new comedy starring Michael Angarano, Sam Rockwell, Jennifer Coolidge, and Jemaine Clement. [AUDIO 1] [AUDIO 2]

#1 New York Times bestselling author Vince Flynn returns with his most exhilarating political thriller to date, a pulse-pounding tale of espionage, covert intelligence, and counterterrorism. Our good friend Vince Flynn stopped by to talk about his new book, Pursuit of Honor: A Novel and call Elliot a “pussy.” [AUDIO 1] [AUDIO 2] [AUDIO 3]

“When I was petting [the stingrays]… I sort of thought, ‘Isn’t this how that Austrailian, like, animal hunter died?’” Vince Vaughn chatted with Elliot and Diane about Couples Retreat, Bora Bora, and hockey. [AUDIO]

Welcome back to chez Bertinelli, where life is as crazy and comical as ever. This month’s Ladies’ Home Journal cover girl, Valerie Bertinelli (thanks, Elliot!), gave us a call to talk about Finding It: And Satisfying My Hunger for Life without Opening the Fridge. [AUDIO]

BONUS: Paging Dr. Zorn! Paging Dr. Zorn! Cooley’s season almost certainly over. Chris Cooley back on the field in a month!?!? The Redskins tight end, acting a bit loopy, gave us an update on his way home from surgery. [AUDIO]

[Week 7, Eagles 27 – Redskins 17]: Chris talks about the chipped tibia, a potentially season-ending injury, and comments on the new Sherman Lewis-run play-calling system. [AUDIO]

EITM football analyst Brandon Noble previews Week 9 in the NFL. [AUDIO]

October 2009

Remember Whitney? Whitney Knoerlin is a former DC101 midday jock who moved to Seattle in July in search of greener pastures and new friends. Spoiler alert! She found neither. [AUDIO]

“I matched with four profiles – and all four girls happen to be in the same country in Africa.” Bill from Winchester “thinks” he may be part of an online dating scam. Everyone else knows it. [AUDIO]

Don’t you hate it when you call up your local radio station in search of Guster tickets for your daughter and the stupid morning disc jockey plays therapist, gutting you (and your failed marriage) like a fish? [AUDIO]

And the rest is KISStory: Other than Gene Simmons hitting on Mitch Fatel’s girlfriend and then groping Elliot’s wife, how awesome was last night’s show? [AUDIO]

Elliot (pic), Diane (pic), and Flounder (pic) got their ears cleaned out today and one of them was a complete p-word about it. [AUDIO]